Neurodivergent Masking: What It Is, Why It Happens, and Why It Should Be Discouraged

Exhaustion: Masking requires a lot of mental and emotional effort that can drain the energy and resources of neurodivergent individuals. Many people report feeling tired, stressed, or burned out after a period of masking. They may need to recover by spending time alone or engaging in activities that soothe them.

Invalidation: Masking can make neurodivergent individuals feel that they are not accepted or valued for who they are. They may struggle with their identity, self-esteem, or sense of belonging. They may also feel guilty or ashamed for hiding their true selves or lying to others.

Isolation: Masking can prevent neurodivergent individuals from forming authentic and meaningful relationships with others who share their experiences or interests. They may feel lonely, misunderstood, or unsupported by their family, friends, or community.

Misdiagnosis: Masking can interfere with the detection and diagnosis of neurodivergence, especially for those who are less visible in their traits. Professionals who are unfamiliar with the complexity and diversity of neurodivergent conditions may ignore, misidentify, or misinterpret them. People who mask may also miss out on the benefits of early intervention, accommodation, or treatment.

Meltdown: Masking can increase the risk of having a meltdown or breakdown when the pressure or demand becomes too high or when the coping mechanism fails. When a neurodivergent person experiences stress or sensory overload, they may experience a meltdown, which is an extreme emotional or physical reaction. A meltdown can manifest as crying, screaming, hitting, biting, running away, shutting down, or self-harming.

Embrace: They can embrace their neurodivergence as a part of their identity and diversity. They can celebrate their strengths, talents, passions, and quirks. They can also acknowledge their challenges, needs, and preferences without shame or fear.

Express: They can express themselves freely and authentically without worrying about conforming to social norms or expectations. They can communicate their thoughts, feelings, opinions, and boundaries clearly and confidently. They can also show their emotions and reactions naturally and appropriately.

Educate: They can educate others about their neurodivergence and how it affects them. They can raise awareness and understanding about the spectrum and variations of neurodiversity. They can also advocate for their rights and accommodations in different settings and situations.

Empower: They can empower themselves and others by creating and joining communities that support and celebrate neurodiversity. They can find and offer mentorship, friendship, or partnership to people who share their experiences or goals. They can also contribute to society with their unique perspectives and skills.